January, 2003

Tongkang Pechah: Poskod 80350 Batu Pahat Johor

Bilik aku sekarang (at the time of writing) macam tongkang pecah, kapal karam dan perkara-perkara yang sama waktu dengannya. Bungkusan dari Malaysia baru sampai tadi; jadi aku lambak aje semua benda atas katil dan lantai. Nanti bila dah ada kudrat aku kemas la. Nak tak nak kena malam ni jugak, kalau tak nak tidur mana, ye tak?

Tadi petang ada game – beberapa alat kelengkapan kurang lengkap jadi terpaksa tergesa-gesa ke bandar nak lengkapkan. Balik game, masuk seminar kejap, pastu balik bilik terus. Duduk kat office sekejap sangat dua-tiga hari ni. Malas sebab a) internet connection point kena share and b) aku ni jenis orang study multitasking. Kalau boleh sambil study sambil ada some minor distraction. Kalau hadap straight terus menerus, mau tercium meja ajer kerja. So kalau aku offline memanjang; kat opis dah la takde game ke apa.. hmm.. alamatnya tidur lah. Tu yang kerja kat bilik ajer dua-tiga hari ni. Tapi kita nak kena ada kat ofis gak. Sebab takut supervisor or student cari.

Malam tadi plak ada latihan dikir barat lagi. My coordination – as usual, shot to kingdom come. Makin lama makin confuse. Nasib baik karang boleh volunteer main kompang. Actually, with proper practice, I think it’s do-able, the whole routine sebenarnya. Cuma hari ni mandom sebab penat. Early night kot tonight. Dah tak larat dah. Esok ada kelas jam 10 pagi – Syed dan Iman antara studentnya. Dah dua sem berturut-turut aku dapat budak Melayu dalam kelas aku.

Apa-apa pun, sebelum tidur, nak kena masukkan satu load washing ke dalam washing machine, dan nak kena settlekan barang-barang yang baru sampai tadi.

Dilemma

I am now in two minds about what I want to do as my PhD thesis. There are two ways out; and I’m not quite sure which is the better choice. One way is to take a generic, menial topic; chuck in some UK / M’sian data – which, in most cases, makes it original by the sheer concept that no one has used the same data set before – churn some numbers, and get a paper that is done within the 3 year limit. The downside of this is that you make a marginal contribution to the discipline and literature; and are quickly forgotten.

Alternatively I could search into something more profound; sort of challenge some of the norms of thought in the area; work towards a real contribution to the theory. The downside of this is that it would take a lot of work; which I myself am not sure is do-able. It would take a lot of effort and there is the risk that I may be over my head in something I am not quite sure I have the expertise to handle.

Case in point – I’ve sort of decided to work on corporate board of directors as the general topic area. Specifically, if I was to go down the easy way, I could do something like compare BOD practices between UK and Malaysia, US and Malaysia or US and UK. Not been done before, but how much will my findings add to the general theory and understanding of the discipline.

Alternatively, I am quite keen in trying to demystify the concept of why companies are adding more and more non-executive directors on boards, where as empirical evidence points in the opposite direction. There has to be value added within the corporate board composition, even though statiscally this is unproven. In addition, I would quite like to study the idea of an ideal board size – the optimal board size, perhaps. Both areas are not explored in great depth -yet.

The upside – major contribution to the literature, if findings are to be found. And that’s what scares me – when asking questions like this, the answers are no longer descriptive and straightforward as a generic survey study; and I run the risk of not having any findings – what, then, is there to show for my PhD? Not to mention the amount of interdisciplinary readings I will have to do – mampu ke aku? Layak ke aku?

Entahlah. Perhaps there are further reaches within my intellect yang aku tak explore lagi. Mungkin, in the end, aku mampu.

Weekend ku weekend ku jua

All in all, not a bad weekend. Saturday morning was spent purchasing the ‘toy’ as defined below; rest of the day dawdled along in an uneventful manner. Secretly prayed that Farnborough would beat Arsenal; not in this lifetime, though. Gillingham came close with Leeds, but they’ll have a replay to sort that out. As usual, my Saturday night was spent most fruitfully by watching Blind Date and Ant and Dec. Hafta start being careful before I become a typical Brit and start watching Eastenders. Dy and Mas came at about 8pm with my dinner; Ana soon called and said we were to have a practice session at Fylde SCR.

The Malaysian Society is putting up a dikir barat for the International Night on 28 Feb; I am way too uncoordinated so I volunteered to be a percussionist. Since the percussions are still stuck in Glasgow; I gave the actual moves a shot – not bad, pretty impressed with myself – but then again my repertoir of skills in this department is not too highly rated, so when I say I was good, it means I knew 75% of the time whether I was to go left or right. Another practice session on Wednesday.

Sunday was so-so; made a proper breakfast for the first time since I arrived here, I think. Watched part of Spy Game on DVD; then laboriously began reading another journal article while waiting for Man Utd to play West Ham. Ana, Khalid and Rai went to watch the game at Old Trafford ; there was actually an extra ticket but funds did not permit my journey. I was a bit anxious, as United have, in the previous two years, succumbed in the fourth round of the FA Cup; to West Ham, no less, in 2001!

But the West Ham of days ayonder were no longer to be seen ; they were totally thrashed and demolished at 6-0; 2 of the goals coming from Monsieur Giggs, no less! Ruud got two, Ole and Phil managed one a piece. Waited for some better news – along the lines of having Liverpool knocked out by Crystal Palace and Chelsea made to eat humble pie by Shrewsbury; but it was not to be. Liverpool have a replay though after a scoreless draw; but Chelsea shot my dreams to outer space by showing Shrewsbury who was boss : 4-0 to the Blues was the final score.

Was changed for bed when Jiden called; a surprise party of sorts for Khalid – who turned 23 yesterday. Trudged all the way to Fylde; only after being reassured that there were escorts for the trip back to Graduate. Khalid, of course, decided that tonight was a good night to hang out at Abang Ijan’s place and had to be ‘coaxed’ back under various pretences for his surprise party. It was worth the effort, though, as he was totally and absolutely surprised – good thing the whole reaction was caught on camera. Good cake, and managed to watch a bit of the Superbowl as well. Not a bad weekend at all!